I've struggled with a lot of things over the years. Most of them are pretty common. My weight, my job, my relationships, just to name a few. Right now my biggest struggle is with waiting. For anyone who doesn't know, and I doubt there are many, I'm having a baby. He is due in two days. October 23, 2011 is supposedly the day he will make his grand entrance into the world. That is if he falls into the 5% of babies who actually come on their due date. I feel like this whole pregnancy process has been nothing but a big wait. First it was waiting for the test results to come back to see if I was indeed pregnant. Then there was the wait until the first doctor's appointment to have an ultrasound, giving me my first inside look at the little alien growing inside.
Next came the waiting out of the first trimester, that in itself was quite the feat. Most people are about six to seven weeks along before they find out a baby is coming. I was three. This fact made the wait feel so much longer. When I finally made it past the first trimester milestone I was forced to wait once again for the 20 week mark to find out what we were having. God bless modern technology for allowing us to at least find out the sex. If I had to wait nine months for that I would have driven myself more insane than I already did.
Waiting got a little easier once I found out we were having a boy. I now could focus my attention on coming up with a theme for the nursery. My days began to fill with vacations, decorating, planning and various other activities. This was a pleasant distraction while I waited for the day of my baby shower. Once that day passed it was time to wait until the first day of my maternity leave. That started 2 weeks ago. Now all I can do is wait for the big day.
Everything is ready for Baby J's arrival. The nursery has been complete for almost 2 months. I have cooked more meals in advance than I can count and frozen for those first few weeks after we come home from the hospital. My house has been scrubbed from top to bottom. Hospital bags are packed, awaiting the day they are loaded into the car for the big adventure. I have a rockin birthing playlist loaded onto two separate iPods in event of a malfunction. An entire cloth bag of various snacks sits patiently on the freezer waiting to provide Jim and my mom with the much needed nourishment during labor. The car seats are installed. All in all I would say I'm ready for this major change in my life to occur. But alas I must wait, and this is by far the hardest wait of all!