Only One?

Since I've had Baby J, the number one question I get is "So when are you having your next one?" When I respond, "Ummm, never," people look at me with a horrified expression.  They seem to be appalled by my lack of desire to procreate further.  I am then told I'll change my mind, or how could I do that to my child, or he has to have a sibling to play with.  I ask you, why?  Why is it a necessity to have more kids?  What is wrong with wanting an only child?  I'll tell you wants wrong.  Absolutely nothing!  We only want one kid.  A small little family of three.  It's a perfect number. 


Jim was an only child and I grow up in an only child type setting considering my brother and sister both went away to college by the time I was five.  We both liked this arrangement and want it for our family. When I was a kid I got to do all sorts of cool things with my parents like traveling across the country.  My brother and sister took some neat vacations too, but not like the ones I was so fortunate to go on.  All of this was made possible because there was only one of me.  I feel the travel I got to do really enriched my life and opened my eyes to a world outside of the small backwoods town I grew up in.

Jim and I want to take Baby J to all sorts of cool places.  New York, Seattle, Victoria, and Washington D.C. just to name a few.  With the way the economy is going and the rate of inflation, we wouldn't be able to do all the things we want to do with more than one kid unless we won the lottery.

In addition to wanting to do things with Baby J, I think being an only child develops the creative side of a child's brain in a special way.  When a child doesn't always have a playmate around he is forced to find ways to entertain himself.  I know I sure did.  I had imaginary friends and we would spend hours in the backyard making mud pies in my playhouse or playing school.  Even now, as I write this, I remember how much fun I had playing by myself.

Since Baby J will be in daycare he will not miss out on socializing with his peers.  He will learn the same social skills there, like conflict resolution and communication, that he would learn with a sibling.  So I am not worried about him being able to function in society.  I'm sure he will be fine.

All in all if you want to judge me for only wanting one kid, then go ahead.  It's a personal preference. As are most things in life.  Besides, we already have three cats and adding more kids would just be too chaotic.